Our Work Is Never Over
Current Song: "Harder Better Faster Stronger" -- Daft Punk
I slept through my classes today which, admittedly, was not the best choice. Actually I probably could have made it to the second one but by that point I was pretty committed to not changing out of my sweatpants. I am a lazy bastard.
I pulled the drawings I did off of the wall and binned them. Then Rodrigo asked me where they went and said that he had liked them. I have a problem where I hate almost all of my own work and I can't stand to have my shameful attempts displayed and secretly critiqued, so I panicked and threw them out. I think it's better this way.
Today I booked myself a luxury vacation for Spring Break. My mom worries about me because I love traveling alone, but a) I hate being beholden to someone else's schedule or desires, and b) everyone I know is totally unreliable and also kind of sucks. So they're not invited. I think my mom mostly worries that I'm an insane loner, and I'm not, really, I just have a hard time meeting people who do what they say they are going to do. As in, I have never met anyone who did what they said they were going to do. This strongly compels me to mistrust everyone, which doesn't exactly make me warm and welcoming. Also, the insanity doesn't help.
I'm in an unwinnable war here, and there's no real way out unless I'm the one that leaves. If you left me, I'd be broken. If I left you, I'd be okay. But I don't trust you not to turn your back on me, which is why I keep running away. Why can't you be the person you used to be?
I slept through my classes today which, admittedly, was not the best choice. Actually I probably could have made it to the second one but by that point I was pretty committed to not changing out of my sweatpants. I am a lazy bastard.
I pulled the drawings I did off of the wall and binned them. Then Rodrigo asked me where they went and said that he had liked them. I have a problem where I hate almost all of my own work and I can't stand to have my shameful attempts displayed and secretly critiqued, so I panicked and threw them out. I think it's better this way.
Today I booked myself a luxury vacation for Spring Break. My mom worries about me because I love traveling alone, but a) I hate being beholden to someone else's schedule or desires, and b) everyone I know is totally unreliable and also kind of sucks. So they're not invited. I think my mom mostly worries that I'm an insane loner, and I'm not, really, I just have a hard time meeting people who do what they say they are going to do. As in, I have never met anyone who did what they said they were going to do. This strongly compels me to mistrust everyone, which doesn't exactly make me warm and welcoming. Also, the insanity doesn't help.
I'm in an unwinnable war here, and there's no real way out unless I'm the one that leaves. If you left me, I'd be broken. If I left you, I'd be okay. But I don't trust you not to turn your back on me, which is why I keep running away. Why can't you be the person you used to be?
spit at you by Nil at 12:24 AM
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