My Friends, My Habits, My Family

I default to self-destructive whenever I don't get my way, so I think you should recognize how much I'm doing to keep this on time and on track, but the line between fantasy and reality for me is less a line than a value change. I don't express myself in art but I do express myself in contemplation, turning it back on you with anger and then kicking myself to death. I'm not a dancer but I know the twist, I can see this coming but I'm standing in front of it waving my arms like you're the one who's going to turn. I don't love you but I know you. I've got the third-best seat in the house but the surcharge cost more than the ticket. Bring the lights up so I can see where I went wrong. You stopped looking me in the eye and now I'm not sure what I saw. Eyewitness accounts are the least reliable, they said. Everybody lies even when it doesn't matter. I need to disappear for a while and you need to remember how to miss me. I'm not crazy enough to see what I've done, I need you to remind me casually.